Rosemary's Blog

Who are the Bond brothers buried right next to my sons Drew and Jeremiah in the Lexington Cemetery in Lexington, KY? Their names are Thomas Waters Bond, the older brother to Frank Benson Bond. Why are they buried alone and not with their parents or other relatives?

Honestly I do not remember when I first noticed the graves of Thomas and Frank. It may have been that first dark year when Luther and I wandered aimlessly there every Thursday. It may have been a year or two later when visiting the graves of Drew and Jeremiah was not as painful and I was able to look beyond their graves to see those two solitary headstones. I do know that when I did notice them, I was never the same.

Thomas Waters Bond died On December 20, 1859 at age 2 years, 4 months and 16 days. That would make his birthday sometime around August 4, 1857.

Frank Benson Bond died on May 4, 1875 at age 15 years, 7 months and 19 days. His birthday would be close to October 16, 1859. Frank was born into the Bond family about two months before his older brother Thomas died in 1859.

Tomorrow is July 23rd, 2014. What is the significance of the number twenty-two with respect to tomorrow’s date. Those of you who know me well know the answer…it has been twenty-two years ago tomorrow that my sons Drew and Jeremiah passed from this physical world into the spiritual world.

At this time twenty-two years ago, Drew and Jeremiah were alive and well. They were in Indianapolis at the concert they had longed to attend for months. It’s now 9:46 pm. Who was performing twenty-two years ago at this very moment? Was it Metallic or Faith No More, one of the two acts on that night prior to Guns n Roses. The boys had great seats and were living their dream of being together at the concert of the year. Were they thinking of the three of us left at home? I seriously doubt it. Our family has always loved music and going to concerts. They were in their element. They were waiting for Guns n Roses to hit the stage.

I have no idea when the concert was finally over. All I know for certain is that Drew called us at 2 AM and made the statement that has lived with me for the past twenty-two years. He said, “Mom, we’ve had the greatest night of our lives.” How prophetic was that statement? Knowing their last night was the greatest night of their lives has carried me day after day, night after night. It carries me tonight as I sit here reliving that last night again.

Drew and Jeremiah, you have not left our lives. Your Dad, your brother Jordan and I have not forgotten the love and light you brought to our lives. We miss you as much today as we did twenty-two years ago. We are closer to you each day…..

Love,

Mom

Today is April 27, 2014. Forty years ago today, April 27, 1974, Andrew Siler Smith was our first born son. That day is as clear in my mind today as it was forty years ago. Luther and I were both pharmacists working in Louisville, KY. Luther was the manager of the Walgreens in the Heyburn Building in downtown Louisville. I was a pharmacist working for SuperX. We were living in our first home at 1241 Beechwood Ave in New Albany, IN. Luther had just turned thirty and I was twenty-six. We were young. We were excited. We were nervous about having a child. We had two dogs, a poodle name Corey and an airedale named McKeever. Our world was about to change forever.

Andrew Siler Smith was born at 5:35 pm on April 27, 1974. He was not a pretty baby! He was jaundice and actually looked like a little old man when he was born. How we fell in love with that little old man at first sight! The birth of a child is truly a miracle. Luther and I have been blessed with three miracles in our lives; Drew, Jeremiah and Jordan. Our lives would not have been fulfilled without all of them.

While in the hospital I was told I could not name our son Andrew Siler Smith because of his initials! I always knew we would call him Drew so his initials would never be an issue. How wrong I was. I clearly remember the day Drew came home from elementary school and said, “Do you know what my inititals are?” Believe me, any monogram I had for Drew always had D.S.S.

Drew has let us know that he is with us today on his birthday. Last night, we decided to watch the movie Philomena. We had always wanted to watch it but knew the story and so far had avoided the pain we knew we would feel. The story broke our hearts. Here was an unwed mother whose son was taken from her in Ireland and sold to an American couple. She had kept her secret for 50 years. Philomena’s son had died years before she finally tracked him down in Washington, DC. Watching Judy Dench in this role at the point when she realized her son was dead actually made me sob. I felt the emotion she was feeling. I felt the emotion that the real Philomena felt at that pivotal moment. I had felt that loss.

At one point in the movie, Philomena was trying to meet with her son’s partner to get any information she could about her son. Suddenly a red Miata convertible drove up in the scene where Philomena had gone to his house to confront him. A red Miata only hours before Drew’s 40th birthday!

This afternoon, we left the farm in Lexington to go to the Lexington Cemetery to visit Drew and Jeremiah’s graves for Drew’s birthday. Just as we were turning from Iron Works Pike
onto Newtown Rd., another red Miata convertible was there at the four way stop!! Drew was letting us know he knew we were thinking of him on his special day – like we think of he and Jeremiah on each and every day.

We visited the cemetery and sat on their bench amid the beautiful yellow and red tupils and flowering trees that Taylor and Charlie Beach had planted in memory of the boys more than twenty years ago. It was a perfect day, sunny and 77 degrees. The flowers Michler Florist had delivered for both of our sons were beautiful. We sat and remembered. We remembered forty years ago. We remembered a baby then a boy then a man. We remembered a kind, compassionate, loving son who will never, ever be forgotten while I have breath in this body. I love you Drew.

Love,

Mom

March Match 2014, the first class competition for giving at The McCallie School was won today by the Class of 1992.  Our oldest son Drew Smith was a member of the Class of 1992 after being a four year boarding student at McCallie.  Drew did not contribute financially to the winning total for his class because he and his younger brother Jeremiah were killed in July of 1992 two months after graduation.  Drew did contribute in a most unusual way to March Match.  At the suggestion of his friend and 92′ classmate Andy Mims, the young men of the class of were asked to make donations in memory of Drew. 

Honor, Truth and Duty are the bywords of The McCallie School.  Drew’s 92′ classmates are the epitome of these words.  As I opened each note from McCallie notifying us that another of Drew’s friends had made a donation in his memory, tears of joy flooded my eyes.  If there was a phone number included with the donation, I immediately called the donor.  One of first I called was David Office, one of Drew’s closest friends from his first day at McCallie as a freshman.  David has spent the past twenty years serving his country in the service as well as his present position as a private contractor with the Department of Defense.  Hearing David’s voice after all these years was such a blessing.

Many of Drew’s classmates have sent me e-mails and notes over the past few weeks.  Reconnecting with so many of them has meant the world to both Luther and me.  To know Drew hasn’t been forgotten means the world.  The Class of 1992 may have won the March Match but in my heart they won much more.  They won the love and admiration of those of us who love and miss Drew and Jeremiah Smith.  

Rosemary C. Smith

    Twenty years- how is it possible that I am still alive and breathing twenty years after my sons Drew and Jeremiah left to attend the Guns N’ Roses concert in Indianapolis back on July 22, 1992?  I will never forget the last time I saw them as they came to my drugstore the morning of July 22nd.  They were as excited as I had ever seen them.  They came for money for the trip…surprise!  I went out with them as they got in Drew’s red Miata, top down to head to Indianapolis.  They looked radiant!  They both had their baseball caps on backwards.  They had their cell phone and directions to the Canterbury Hotel in Indy very close to the concert arena.  I was as excited as they were for their adventure.  Little did I suspect that they were prepraring for the biggest adventure of any life – life after death.

     These past twenty years have been a journey for me, for Luther and for Jordan.  We have cried a million tears for those two boys who died the morning of July 23rd on the way home from that concert.  We have done everything in our power to keep their memory alive.  We have lived every day in this painful physical plane with the knowledge that they had gone on before us. 

    Tonight, I sit here in Lexington, Kentucky reliving the hours leading up to the morning of July 23 rd when the Beattyville Chief of Police came into my drugstore and said the two words that would change my life forever, “Drew’s dead.”  My heart still cannot believe that both Drew and Jeremiah died that beautiful July morning twenty years ago.  There has not been a single day in these past twenty years that I have not missed them with every fiber in my body.  They were a part of me, a part of my physical and spiritual self that is now missing.  I know deep in my soul that this will always be true. 

     I had a call yesterday from John Caffery, Jeremiah’s best friend.  He may never know what his phone call meant to Luther and me.  We were in the car driving back to KY from Hilton Head.  He wanted us to know that he had not forgotten Jeremiah.  He said he knew Jeremiah was “always around me.”  John and Jeremiah were as close as any brothers could ever be.  Jeremiah’s death has affected John in ways that not even I can fully understand.  Bless him for remembering us at this difficult time.

     For those of you who know me, you know I am rarely at a loss for words.  Well, tonight is one of those rare occasions.  I am emotionally drained after tweny years of being without Drew and Jeremiah.  I will never understand on this earth why I am still living after two bouts with cancer while my teenage sons are now dead twenty years.  How does that make sense?  How does a tragedy like the Batman theatre massacre that took place two nights ago in Aurora, Colorado happen? How in the world can one young man kill 12 people and injure 58 so close to the same area where our dear friends Joe and Ann Kechter lost their son Matthew in the Columbine school massacre?  What has our world come to?  Twelve families are facing the same terror we faced twenty years ago tonight.  What a senseless tragedy.

     It is now 11:45PM.  I may cry myself to sleep tonight.  I’ve been surrounded by yellow butterflies all day today.  The boys are telling me they are OK.  Boys, it is your Mom that is still not OK.  I miss you.

Love,

Mom

July 1, 2011

Last week my two beautiful sons, Sean Robert and Kyle Joseph, were taken from this world in a horrible and tragic way. Despite the tremendous loss to all of us, their two beautiful souls are now giving us the inspiration, strength and positive energy to change the world into what they envision it can be. The love that Sean and Kyle are generating in the universe is phenomenal and it is all around us. Now it is up to us to each do our part. So I invite you and challenge you to help them carry on their mission.

– Maria

Note from Rosemary: Maria Pe and I have become close friends since I sent her a packet after learning about the death of her precious sons Sean and Kyle. She sent me the following e-mail yesterday which brought me to tears. I asked her permission to share it here on my blog. This story from her niece Alicia is an affirmation for me just how close our special angels are to each of us.

Hi Rosemary,

I just wanted to share with you this beautiful story that my niece sent me last night.

Love, Maria

——————————————————————————–
Date: Mon, 10 Oct 2011 20:02:58 -0700
Subject: Sean and Kyle

Dear Auntie,

This past weekend I went on a three day backpacking/ white water rafting trip. Preparing for this trip, I was extremely nervous about going and was even thinking about changing my mind and backing out. This particular trip is the hardest Wilderness Course they offer on campus and on an intensity and physical difficulty scale of 1 to 5, it was a 5. We had to be able to rig and paddle our own boat with our own gear in it, along with a bunch of other weight. This made me extremely nervous along with the fact that there were a couple level 3 and 4 rapids on the 15 mile stretch we were paddling. The night before the trip I was getting extremely anxious, but decided I would just go for it since it would push me out of my comfort zone. The next morning we drove out of Flagstaff and hiked down to an isolated portion of the Verde River. When I got in my boat I was scared out of my mind and the head guide could see the fear on my face. Out of the 12 people that went, he looked directly at me and simply said, “Alicia, take a deep breath. You will be fine because we have two extremely experienced guides coming with us that will make sure you get through every rapid safely. Their names are Sean and Kyle.” I was at a loss for words. All of a sudden I had this huge breath of relief and the most peaceful feeling I have ever experienced. I still cannot even begin to wrap my head around it.

As the trip went on, the connection became even stronger. As I got to know the two guides, I found that their personalities were incredibly similar to Sean and Kyles’.
The guide named Sean was very laid back and extremely comfortable in his own skin. He was Navajo and had such a wise outlook on life. He taught us so much and really opened up our eyes to the world around us and the effect we have on it. He even p assed around this bracelet that he wears everyday and told us the story behind it. It reminded of the necklace Sean always wears.

Our guide, Kyle, was very different from Sean. He was a go-getter; always upbeat and ready to ride the rapid first. For the whole trip, he would go down the big rapids before us, leading the way. Every execution was perfect. He ran each rapid with ease to show us how it was done. He would then wait at the bottom of the rapid to make sure everyone came down safely.

I am so glad that I decided to go on this trip. It was life changing.

Love you,
Alicia

—
Alicia Nicole Pe
Art Education Major ● Peer Jacks Mentor
T.V. Services/ Sports Production Crew Member
Northern Arizona University